As always insight always comes to me in the latest hour of the evening. This evening was shadowed with the feelings of melancholy and sadness. Sometimes you just want to hide from the world and the only one you can handle talking to is your best girlfriend. On this evening we went to our favorite martini bar to bitch about life, we knew that we could hide out on our favorite corner couch, eat chocolate and drink a good martini. We also knew that we would hopefully not be bothered by anyone we knew. It is always great when your girlfriend is in the same pissy mood that you are. I knew we both felt like crap when Martini AstiI realized that neither of us had done our hair. The ponytail was a fashion statement that evening. Martinis are usually the inspiration for laughter and giggles however on that evening I could tell that they were going to be the catalyst of tears.
We decided on the Apple martini because we needed something sweet to cheer us up. Our favorite bartender must have sensed that we were not having the best life because when the martinis arrived he had put a special twist on them just for us. I had to admire this martini because it was a work of art. The Apple martini is a blend of Vodka and Sour Apple Schnapps with a splash of sour mix. However this evening the martini was all about the accessories. The glass was rimmed with white rock sugar and the edge of the glass was garnished with a wedge of sharp cheddar cheese. It was truly divine.
We raised our martini glasses and toasted to our Fathers. As I took my first sip I let out a big sigh, it was the perfect combination of the sour green apple mixed with the sweetness of the sugared rim. It was a great martini, both our Daddy's would have loved it. As we looked at each other we both burst into tears and then we realized that we were crying in our martini bar and started to giggle. We were both pissy and sad. Why? Because it was the night before Father's Day and we were both paying tribute to our beloved Dad's, both of which had passed on. There is something about Fathers and Daughters, there is an unspoken connection, and when it is gone life truly is never the same. We started talking about our Dad's; even though they never knew each other they were very similar. Our Father's both loved the high life, a great dinner, fantastic martinis and they were both jokers.
Not all Fathers and daughters have this "apple of their father's eye" relationship. But we both felt blessed that we had been those apples. I do not remember when it started but there was always a sparkle in my dad's eye when he saw me. The feeling of being swept up in his embrace, the big warm hug from Dad was the ultimate affection. We both remembered how he was always there for us, no matter what we did. Right or wrong he backed us up and bailed us out, and in my case I was usually getting bailed out. Secretly I think my Dad loved that I stirred the shit because sometimes I would catch him laughing as he told my mom what I had done. My mother was always horrified but I think my father was proud of my shanagins. We agreed that our fathers were not perfect, they were far from it. They both made huge mistakes but we realized that they only did the best that they could. But part of being the "apple of their eye" is that we did not care that they made mistakes, we loved them unconditionally as they did us.
In life we always search for the unconditional love but in relationships it never really happens. With your partner there are always boundaries and expectations but with a father and daughter there is always acceptance. Is that why I have heard that a woman always looks for a man who is just like her father! Is this unconditional love the reason why daughters always want their fathers to be proud of them? Why we strive to prove to our dad's that we can do it? Why is it always our Dad that we call when we need advice, support and the strength to just get through it. However, Dads feel the same way, nothing makes them more blissful then the excitement of their daughter's success. When she is wronged by someone, nothing can stop him from protecting her. God help the man that breaks her heart, a father will never forgive him. No one can answer why this relationship is so special but only that it just is.